If we are mistaken, we ask for forgiveness. But if people judge us on how they perceive us to be then we cannot make any apologies for their presumptions. Good or bad, they are actually entitled to their personal opinions about us. If they are positive, take it in stride, be thankful and continue that trait so that it may be passed on to other people as well. If they give you negative feedback, ask yourself, meditate, look back and think if you are that. If you are not, then let go, learn, forgive and just move on. Yes, it may be easier said than done. But what choice do you have left? None.

If you are judged poorly and people pressure you to become someone you are not, never ever apologize for who you are. Who you are now are the results of who you were in the past. The then has molded you to become what you are capable of doing now. You are stronger now, more patient, more loving and if there is more and more, then the better.

The past is a stepping stone of who you are today. And if you think that you are someone of depth, never apologize for that. What for? You can never please anyone; ironically you cannot even please yourself. There will always be that tiny thing that will nag you and you would end up finding fault in yourself until you understand.

Be proud of who you are because you have worked hard for this. No, we are not talking about physical attributes. We are talking about what is inside. There are people who have worked so hard to become who they are today, sadly, there are people also who wants to bring you down. Regardless of how much success you have achieved when people find the need to break your spirit they will. They want you to question your credibility, your stand and your strength. That is why you must realize that there are no apologies for becoming great just as long as you are not hurting anyone else.

No apologies. Stand up for what you believe in. if you believe in yourself and you know that you are not stepping on anyone on your way to the top then stand up for that. Don’t apologize for being great. Don’t apologize for trying. Don’t apologize for giving it all you have got. Don’t apologize for not giving up. And don’t apologize for wanting to reach your dreams. Bottom line; just don’t apologize for who you are. You are what you are and people need to accept that, if they can’t then they are not supposed to be a part of your life.

Have you ever had that insane crush feeling you know, the:” I think I like the person but I really can’t tell because I think this person likes someone else?”  There are a lot of those kinds of feelings especially when you’re actually younger like in your teens. But who would expect that someone on their late 20’s to their early 30’s would still feel that same insecure feeling? Oh there is still that, surprisingly so, there are still people who feel that way. There’s that look, that stare, that smile that you would mistakenly assume and over analyze at the end of the night. Who would have thought that not only women feel that crazy emotion but men find themselves questioning too of what it was. Isn’t it nice to be giddy and in love? Is it love though? Infatuation? What do you then when you do feel like you are “in-like” with the person. Do you tell them? Or do you hide it just like any other hidden agendas in your life.

We all know hiding something will eventually come out in the open especially if these are deep and strong feelings for someone. It may be understandable if you are hiding your feelings because it is forbidden but if you are both single, what then is holding you back?

One thing that is most common of these hidden agendas, is REJECTION. Who would want to be publicly humiliated, or even not publicly? Rejection is one form of humiliation, especially if you are rejected by someone you like. You might over analyze and assume all situations and end up with the wrong conclusion. You surely are courting disappointment with what you’re doing and eventually heartbreak if you’re not careful.

That is why there are a lot of men and women out there who have this hidden agenda, meaning hidden feelings for people they like, loathe, love. Whatever emotion it is, there is that one thing that you can’t explain why you need to hid it from that person. Whatever reasons there is it is only you who can cope with that hidden feeling. It is easier to tell someone how you feel, May it be negative or positive because it makes you feel relieved. But what if you don’t want the aftershock? Meaning you can’t accept the fact that you’re either rejected or scorned or probably have the feelings reciprocated. Nevertheless, there will come a point in our lives that we need to tell them how we feel. Especially if the feelings are strong and deep. Who knows, you might end up having mutual feelings in the end everybody is happy.

Isn’t it sad, when you have a friendship that has been long standing for ages? The friendship that has been through a lot of fights, laughter, deep talks, shallow giggles and all that,  Then one day just because life hit you, you or the friend immediately change, become cold, have outgrown each other and just have that moment wherein you know things will never be the same again.

It is sad if you know that you love that friend and years of friendship is on the line, but what if deep inside you know it’s just over, nothing will ever change the fact that  both of you have changed with time and experience and eventually grew apart or fell apart. Just like a love relationship, sometimes there are just couples who just realize out of the blue that they aren’t meant for each other. And yes it’s sad but it is just the way it is.

Nothing is more hurting than pretending to a friend that you’re okay with it. Change is inevitable, a lot of people do. Every day. And eventually you will too, soon and maybe even when you wake up in the morning you’ll just surprisingly realize that yes you have grown that much and just can’t be the same one you were before. It is not a bad thing, it’s not like you both turned into bad people, it’s just that you have become two different people with two different worlds and if you have had it easier before, maybe now, things just aren’t meant to be.

We all know God has a plan for everything. Maybe he gave you each other to learn and grow with each other, but this may be the time that you need to let go, be each other’s support and just grow apart and let other people in.

Whoever said letting go is ever easy. Change is hard, and some people just don’t want to accept reality. Reality hurts and people don’t want that hurt. But sometimes you end up having with no choice other than acceptance. You know that whatever happens, you’ll live and you’ll stay strong and move on. If the friendship remains after everything then it is meant for both parties, but if not then it will always be for the best.

This is to all friendships that have lasted eons and lifetimes, and this is also for friendships that have been shipwrecked and stormed may have sunk and may have to even be rebuilt. This is in general for friendships all over. Cherish every moment while you can. ☺

There are times in our growing up years that you would end up liking someone who doesn’t like you. Or someone likes you that you don’t really like that much. It’s not there’s something wrong with the person liking you, it’s just that he or she may not so much be your type. Personality wise and physically, there are just people who you get that instant connection with, and the others well they plainly don’t have that spark.

It is a little bit questionable on how to describe and make people understand what a spark is or that “connection” you might seem to have but others can’t seem to find. It’s hard to be walking down the street or mall and you find people who are deeply in love and may seem like to last forever and you yourself can’t find one.

It’s not that you’re ugly or dumb, it’s not that anybody like you or you don’t like anyone. It’s just that, you’re having a hard time getting to find that right connection. For some, a passing fancy may be alright, but for those who are deeper into emotions they wouldn’t settle for anything less than what they truly deserve.

Don’t you even think about times when people get to like you but you can’t reciprocate the feeling? Isn’t it a bit strange and annoying? And just downright frustrating. This is why life is complicated and people complicate life more so. Simple things they overanalyze, things that should be made common sense don’t end up just so. Human beings tend to make thing harder, for the thrill, for the complication and just for that extra spice some may call it some may call it effort and a waste of time.

If life was that easy, where the one you like  – likes you back, life then would be perfect and what’s the fun in that? We need the complications to make our lives less boring and less predictable. The element  of surprise will always be a good advantage. Who knows, you’d even end up surprising yourself, the “not so much your type” may end up the one you’ve been waiting for all your life.

Nonexistent as defined the condition of not existing. In other words, lay man terms it is like it maybe a thing, person, place and even an event does not exist or is just not there. You might be wondering where I am going with this. Well picture out someone you like, and they just don’t even know that you exist. That you are there – liking them to the point that it is pathetic because they don’t literally know you exist as a person.

You may wait for a miracle to happen or even a genie to grant you three wishes, to be optimistic about all of these, if there is a will there is a way. If you think that person you like doesn’t even notice you what do you possibly do next? Will you start to make a move initially? Or just be coy and start of us mere acquaintances? It may sound racist but in truth, there are some countries that are overly eager and more confident with approaching the guy or girl that they like. Take for example when you are in a bar, if you see someone you are attracted to, and you don’t know them, you find ways to let them know you exist. Which may be a good thing, but there are some people who are not really comfortable with that kind f move.

There are people who are overly shy or insecure and when they begin to like someone, they automatically shy away shut themselves off and just basically hide. And those feeling however deep or shallow it may be, will stay hidden and might never be expressed how long the person who has it intends to keep it. It’s just sad that you can’t let the person you like know since they don’t even know you exist. Is it easier than if you’re friends? Is it easier to tell a friend you like them and take the risk or ruining your entire friendship than letting someone who doesn’t even know you exist know that you like them? Oh the irony of life. The easier things are made harder and vice versa.

How we wish it was that easy, you like someone and they like you back. Tada! No hassles and no heartbreaks. What’s the thrill in that though? Is it not the human nature thing to make life more complicated than it really is? We are the ones who want life to be all in a jumble. In truth, life isn’t that complicated we just want it to be because – it’s more fun. Makes you feel more alive. Doesn’t it?

But so here goes, the story of the man who likes a woman but the woman doesn’t even know it. What to do with this kind of dilemma? Basically, it all boils down into one solution and point of view, if you really like the person, you will do anything in your power to let them know and make them feel so. Risks will be everything in betweens and it won’t matter because again, strong feelings will always overcome fear. ☺

There are people who always assume that people who are single will always be lonely. Don’t you even think that maybe, probably these single people are “alone” and happy? There comes a point in life that you need space. From family, from your friends and even from a love one you know you have to set some time apart in order for you not to forget how it is to be alone. There will come a time, especially if you can get unlucky in love, you break up with someone and you automatically think life isn’t the same anymore. Its probably true since you might have become a better person or made have learned a lot for you to change. But, the issue here will be – will you be okay doing things alone when you have been so attached to doing things with someone else? Especially those who have been in long relationships and has abruptly ended, it is real that it will be very hard coping up.

But, there will always be an exemption in these kinds of situations. There comes a point in your life that you accept reality and accept what has happened in the past. With acceptance is the key to moving on and being happy. And when you’re happy regardless if you’re eating alone in a coffee shop, reading a book in the park alone, going to church alone or probably even watching a movie by yourself, doing all of those things with no one else by yourself will never be a big issue. It wont matter!

Why wont it matter? Well for one, just because you’re doing these things alone it means that your unhappy and lonely. It just means that you have accepted the fact that the real world may come to this and for the meantime you will be alone, but hopefully not for the long haul. Who doesn’t want to have someone to be with for the rest of their life? Sure there may be other people who do but the majority of the human beings in this world would want a partner or even just a child of their own so that they wont live life alone. In truth it is nice to have someone you can share things with ad share memories with. But what if you don’t? Do you need to get bitter about and blame other people? No you should because again, being single or alone doesn’t mean that you are sad, unhappy or lonely. Remember you have friends, you have your family, and they too can make you happy. You can not base your total happiness with just one person? If God will give it to you then so be it, but he won’t take away the other people in your life right?

When you’re alone, think about all the things and decisions that you can do and make. You don’t need to impress people or ask people for permission. You are entitled to your own happiness. You do not need to rely being happy on someone else, that is why being alone or single doesn’t mean unhappiness. You can feel complete and happy on your own. Remember when they weren’t in your life before this, you were once a person alone.

“When life gives you lemons…” you must be familiar with that quote, there’s supposed to be a few words more after those, thus the dot dot dot. You can use the whole quotation actually it’ll help you through life, but I stumbled upon a few people including myself who added words of their own and made it their life quote to live by.

“ When life gives you lemons… get tequila and salt.”

“ When life gives you lemons…throw them at someone.”

These quotes may be ridiculously funny, yet ridiculously applicable for some people who are in the middle of getting curve balls in life. Sometimes when you’re down and life may seem too dark and grey for the meantime, all you have to do is find humor in the situation. Of course, if the situation may call for it. Sometimes, when you add a little comedy into your so sordid and sad life (as you may see it), life would seem a bit more bearable and yes more fun.

The saying just lets us realize that life will always have bumps. If you fix one, you end up having one again and it goes on and on. And if you choose to be unhappy and be bitter about it, then where does that lead you? Nowhere but down. This kind of views in life just screams for a soul overhaul. The better you see life with colored lenses, the better you can deal with all the hurdles that come. You can’t avoid problems and issues, its how you deal with that gets you going. There are most people who may automatically assume that when life is hard, they immediately find fault with themselves and blame themselves for all the disappointments. Hear me, if you think you did something wrong then own up to it, but  all problems have solutions and if there is none, find one. Life will never be about giving up, it will always be about picking you up or facing the problem head on. Giving up should never be an option, if you give up then it’s like you’re saying you don’t believe that God can help you, or He is doing this to hurt you. Now that’s a bit immature and faithless if you ask me. Not to sound so preachy but we got to see life as something beautiful and something good. Yes, if life gives you lemons – make lemonade, even make pink ones – and then probably sell it!

But no, seriously, God will never give us “lemons” we cannot handle. It may seem that way at first but if you look at the bigger picture, you know there will always something to be learned out of it.

Make your life better, even with the so called lemons and you might even get the hang of it sooner or later.

When you’re alone, single, no plans for a relationship, just been out of a relationship and so on and so forth, do you believe you’re automatically a pessimist when it comes to love and happiness? You might be actually shaking your head to disagree, but actually if you really think about don’t you think there is some little bit of truth in it?

Being single or being out of a relationship is never a bad thing, except if you’ve made the wrong choice. Yes, there is a wrong one, when pride and ego gets in the way of you leaving someone you love, that is wrong and will probably remain a mistake for the rest of your life. When there is the so called third party or worse emotional and even physical abuse, there  is that strong reason why you need to get out of the relationship.

So back to the topic, when you’re hurt or have been hurt of course you see the world as ugly and painful. You would assume that all the happy people are out to hurt you and al those who are not just want s to pull you down further in their black hole. It’s sad if you think about it, but it’s probably human nature. Yes, human nature that if you are hurt, you might want to hurt back or just feel the pain and be miserable for a time. The cue there is “for a time” not for a lifetime.

When you have had a broken heart, it may be understandable if you cry for a couple of days, for the men get drunk or even lock yourselves in your room and over analyze everything. Again, you might be disagreeing with me. Maybe so, but if you have been there, you must have probably done that. Heart break is never a happy thing. But if you think about the aftermath, you know you are probably better off. As they say, there will always be a rainbow after the rain, the sunshine after the pain and so on you might get what I mean.

I feel that there is nothing wrong with being a pessimist for a short while just as long as it does not consume you. Being heartbroken will really hurt, especially if you have loved the person in great lengths. There is nothing wrong of thinking that tomorrow might not be a better day for you, just as long as you accept the fact that you “need” to make tomorrow a better one. You may wait, but in the hopes that you will be better. Not wait for that person to take you back. There will always be a reason for letting go, it just means it wasn’t meant to be in the first place. God has good plans for all of us. His plans are not to harm us or put us to shame. Be confident in that – have faith in that and everything will seem better for tomorrow.

Cry if you must, pick yourself up – smile and move on, more good things awaits you, you just need to take hold of it.

There are those who are born pessimist, okay maybe not born but who grew up learning that it is a normal emotion to feel. There are those who are born happy, and even when life brings them down as they say they are the ones who always find the silver lining. It’s hard to be the latter, when everything in your life is going down the drain. May it be from love life, to work, to family to a lot. But you must agree that we should get rid of that notion of “can’t.” what do we mean by that really? Well literally what how do you can’t or cannot. When you search on the web for its definition, you might even get a lot of meaning for this idiomatic phrase, but the one that means so much is the negative form of can –  Negative, which consists  of results with failure because you never tried. Cannot or can’t may mean a lot of things to a lot of people, to those who don’t want to try these are the words that they utter most of the time, think about it and the next time you meet someone who deems himself a failure, count the number of times he says he can’t do this or that.

It’s sad that there are a lot of people in this world who feel that they cannot become a winner or they can’t become the best they can be. We can all be great if we put our minds to it, if we rid ourselves of cant may it be  in doing something, moving on, letting go or trying something new, if we take a step forward and say: “I CAN” think of all the possibilities you can achieve with not giving up.

Saying “I can’t” is an easy term to say you’ve given up and wont even tried. the best lessons in life learned are the ones that you say you can, then doing it, possibly failed results but in the end you know you’ve done all that you could and have learned something in the process.

For example, you are on the verge of letting go, probably of a love one or a relationship. You are drowning in tears, probably drunk and keep telling your confidant that “I can’t do this! I can’t move on!” if you have this kind of approach then of course you won’t move on, you won’t let go and you won’t grow. Don’t you think that’s sad? Being stuck in the past or where you are pathetically now might be the sole reason you’d end up alone or bitter or forever hurt. Now that’s tiring.

Whatever event in your life, why not try to keep telling yourself: “I CAN DO THIS!” And eventually you’ll see things in a different light. I know it may be hard to keep a positive note when you’re all hurting in the inside, but again change is within you, and until you can’t get rid of the I – can’t – notion, you’ll never leave where you are this moment. Please don’t get stuck, tell yourself, there should be no can’t.

There’s a difference with loving someone when you are not in a commitment. Okay, let’s make an exemption; you can even love two people even you’re in a middle of a relationship. Let’s complicate matters more, what about if the man or the woman is married and you feel something for them? Is that excusable too? Is that even to be an exemption?

I don’t think so. We can look pass with a relationship breaking up because you’ve found someone better. That’s fine. But if you’re already in a marriage, that’s not even an option or a probability. You have to keep in mind of the vows you made. So what if you think, yes the operative word is “think” you’re in love with that other someone? You actually can’t do anything about it. You can probably talk about it, but it doesn’t mean it is okay and right to take action upon it.

Loving is the greatest feeling in the world. Especially if you’re sharing it with someone that is right for you and not owned by someone else, you see, when you’re married it was obvious that you have taken vows and made promises in front of your family and friends and even God to love each other unconditionally. It’s not love you plus another one. I don’t get all those cheating spouses, and when you get to ask them why, they would try to rationalize everything with love. No it isn’t it’s actually selfishness. Why cheat? Why look for someone else? If you say you have loved a person even before you got married, why did you even get married in the first place? Why didn’t you choose this previous one? It’s simple. You just didn’t love them that much or not have loved them at all. If you ask fate and the stars they would eventually tell you it wasn’t meant to be.

The fact is, when you’re married, you marry for love and nothing else. If you think you got it wrong then you’re seriously in a deep hole of future regrets. It’s sad that you might encounter a forbidden love, it’s like yes, you love each other but you can’t be together and you can’t do anything about it. It’s sad that you surely can’t turn back time and change things.

That is why, I don’t believe that there is forbidden love. It’s not love, its selfishness. You must remember of the people you will hurt and will be hurting. Yes, you would want to be happy but is it enough to love and be happy when you know you have hurt and disrespected a lot of people that trusts you? What if you have children, what then?

There is nothing more hurtful than letting go of someone you love, especially when you know why it has to end. Whatever reasons you may come up with, nothing will make the situation right of being with someone else when you are presently married.

To love and to be loved in return is the greatest feeling in the world; just make sure you’re not loving someone else’s partner.